Walking OUT of the IEP meeting!!!!

Yup...getting up and WALKING OUT!!!...if you're feeling the disconnect and you KNOW your PARENT INPUT isn't being heard by the IEP 'team'....(btw...the word team...does that mean opposite sides and 2 different teams?...or all on the 'same team' working together???)....then by all means try to salvage what you can of 'the IEP document' that is good and DISAGREE with what you do not believe to be right! GET UP AND LEAVE!

Yes they can continue to finish creating THEIR document..because at that point if parents aren't being 'heard' and their input isn't being considered important..then why be part of something that isn't what you believe to be in the best interest of YOUR CHILD?!

I was given a little GOLD NUGGET PIECE OF ADVICE from a dear friend when I was just learning 'the ropes' of advocating for my daughter when she was just a little iddy biddy CUTE 3 year old...did I say little iddy biddy? She was severely delayed in her COMMUNICATION SKILLS...and all I wanted was some 'speech therapy' for my little iddy biddy. That is all I wanted at that time, after all when she was receiving EARLY INTERVENTION THERAPIES...she had been receiving ST 4 hours a week, she was also receiving OT 3 times a week and PT 2 times a week! *Today...a child will be lucky to receive 'something' once a month!!!!! Yup times sure have changed in 9-10 years time! When my daughter went 'under the umbrella of DOE at 3 years old...SHE GOT NOTHING!!!! Nadda...ziltz...N O T H I N G!!...was I upset?...was I livid?...was I concerned for my daughters progess? ABSOLUTELY!!

...what was THE GOLD NUGGET PIECE OF ADVICE?....
If you are involved in putting together your son or daughters IEP..and things are going smoothly and just going along nicely, no problems keep it going and finish it. But if there comes a time during the meeting if you feel you are overwhelmed with the amount of 'new information' you have to take in at these often times very intimidating IEP meetings for parents new to the system aka newbies then its ok to ask to take a break and ask for the DRAFT of what has been accomplished 'so far'...and CONTINUE IT AT ANOTHER DATE and TIME. IT'S OK TO SAY...time out and let's finish this up next week or whenever is good for everyone.

What IF, you start to feel YOUR PARENT INPUT IS NOT BEING CONSIDERED and your voice isn't being heard and your concerns aren't being taken into consideration on the decisions being made at these meetings...then you can say; "I'd like to STOP THE MEETING RIGHT NOW"...which means screech...the meeting STOPS DEAD COLD and everything is CANCELLED ERASED like a meeting was never held! So all the 'hard work' everyone has done up to that point is like it all never happened and the original IEP document is still in place!

I have used this several times, have shared this little gold nugget with others I have met over the years...it works like magic every time!

Today....the parent I was helping today, felt that no matter what...his concerns were, he was not being heard and he felt 'bullied' to just GO ALONG WITH WHAT "THE TEAM" was FORCEABLY going to do NO MATTER what!! The principal in this case and in MOST cases...takes a stand on just how and where they want 'those students' to receive ESE Services and the entire 'team' absolutely has to do what that principal DICTATES! Bottom line...it is never a COLLABORATIVE TEAM DECISION...but a PRE DECIDED DECISION that is made by 'the Administrator'...THE BOSS of all those sitting around the IEP TEAM TABLE!

Does this sound like one of your IEP 'team' meetings? Don't be too alarmed...it is happening across the nation! EVERY DAY...decisions are being made about OUR CHILDREN'S EDUCATION that is really not about 'the Child' at all and many of y0u are learning that it is also not about what YOU WANT FOR YOUR CHILD...it's about how that Principal wants to 'run their business' of running YOUR CHILD'S SCHOOL...your tax dollars, state and federal dollars....yup...it's all about THE MONEY!...and of course the school 'grade'!

If you have to...GET UP AND WALK OUT! The message that sends is: we are NOT AGREEING here and I'm not going to sit here and be part of this nonsense any longer! Be prepared to file for a Due Process!

Mediation can be a fair and easy way to work out the kinks of not agreeing. STATE MEDIATION....don't ever do a local conflict resolution, that just does NOT make sense to me how anyone that gets paid by the very district you are in disagreement with can be fair and a good mediator! Don't do it! Find out the difference in the two and understand why it could never be a fair 'mediation' process to help iron out differences.

YEAH....'a dad' did it today...he had enough and WALKED OUT! Proud of you 'dad'!

See Wrightslaw for more advocacy 'training'!
www.wrightslaw.com